Ninja Thoughts.

So I have to tell everyone that the site is getting quite popular. Of course your not surprised, but it's still nice news to get. I have been getting some very positive response from the "guess that dish" section and would like to extend the challenge to you. Since most of you can't seem to guess that dish when its anything shy of obvious, I challenge you to find a gross dish and have KungFuChef guess what it is. I bet I can figure it out within 3 tries. Send in your digital pictures of the dish and I will post them up and give it a try. I also want to thank everyone who has been leaving great feedback and suggesting new places to quest for. Thank you for all your support. 

Cheers!

KungFuChef

Guess That Dish!

Heres an easy one... But not easy to eat I think. Notice there is a bucket full of this particular eastern treat!

Guess That Dish!

I would rather eat vegetables!

Office of the drunken slob. (Father's Office LA)

I haven't been to LA for a while but since I referenced one of their burgers as the best so far I am inclined to let everyone know the skinny, rather, the fat of it. This place is a nightmare to get in and its only really open post work hours as far as I know. The line outside can be daunting but unlike New York you can get a sweet tan if you do it shirtless. If your me, you can even pick up ladies by flexing your pectorals and whistling as they walk by. Once inside its a total mob scene, you have to seat yourself which is kind of a joke. Because they usually let you in before something opens up. So I wandered in with my friend and we started scanning tables for availability. Nothing looked like it was gonna be ready but thats ok since I had a sweet pad on the beach and boasted my own patio. So we decided on takeout. The bartender was very accomodating as I ordered one of the many delicious draughts and my date ordered wine (HAHAHAHAHA) while we waited. Seriously, if she wasn't french I would have probably left without her, never ever order wine with a blue cheese burger. You might as well order a shirley temple and put your hair in pigtails. So there are no substitutions here except the burger comes a la carte so you can get any choice of fries. They have a delicious aoli but absolutely no ketchup so don't ask(snobs). After a short wait I went home with her and we ate the burgers. They were so great. Even after spending a good 10 minutes in a box they were still perfect, the bun had not been soaked through with juice and the everything was just perfect. the sweet potato fries rocked as well! I gotta say this burger is rockin. Just the right amount of blue cheese and not an overly salted one like at Spotted Pig. And for two dollars less its a steal! I highly recommend this place for their superb burger, but everything else (decor, ambiance, service) sucks!

5 out of 10 ninja stars

1018 Montana Ave
Santa Monica, CA 90403
(310) 393-2337

Guess That Dish!

HMMMM, is that edible?

Guess That Dish!

YUMMY!

Free Aung San Suu Kyi!! (Burma Restaurant DC)

Chinatown's bustling 7^th street, is full of many quick places for lunch—but if you're really looking for some authentic and spicy food, venture down 6^th street.  For risk-takers and MSG high lovers there's the "Noodle Guy" who makes fresh noodles in the window at Chinatown Express, for Thai enthusiasts there's Kanlaya (more on my beloved Kanlaya some other time), and for the curious there's Burma.  Burma, or present day Myanmar is located in southeast Asia bordering China, Thailand and India—and the influence makes for some interesting and delicious dishes.  For fatties I highly recommend the Pickled Green Tea Leaf Salad, which was a light and refreshing dish with rich flavors including ground shrimp and peanuts.  All  of the curry dishes are right on the money and the mango pork is a must as it is a great example of yummy Burmese flavor.  The dishes were generous, and the service fast and friendly, and most of the items on the menu were under ten dollars—which makes Burma even more likable.  

6 out of 10 ninja stars

740 Sixth St. NW, 

Washington, DC 20001

The slowest pig. (The Spotted Pig NYC)

I arrived at this west village hot spot on a weekend night to be extremely surprised by a packed establishment. When I told the host that my table was going to be 4 people he very quickly said 2 hours. I hate that, a place that doesn't take reservations that still takes 2 hours to get a table at. Ugh. Its like I should pay a guy who lives nearby to go in and make a reservation for me (you can only do it in person) and then have him call me and arrive then. Or I could just come at the suggested time of midnight or during the day. While waiting for my table I managed to find a spot at the bar and began drinking overpriced draught beer and ordered a side of pickles. The pickles were excellent as was the draught, but its just so overpriced its hard to swallow. When my table was finally ready it was upstairs in another crowded dining room. The table was small and the outside seats are merely stools. This kind of sucks. I mean, get a decent chair. and a stool is less than ideal for protecting your back from the jabs and pokes of dumb drunks at the bar behind. I was so drunk at this point that I didnt care about anything. I loved the decor which was pretty cool and interesting with pigs everywhere. The only thing I got was also the reason why I went: the burger (food quest!). Now I was very curtly told I could not substitute anything on this dish, I could only take it away. So, afraid to lose anything of my $15 to some hungry busboy I had the burger as is with the shoestring fries. The burger came out perfectly cooked and very juicy. It was massive I could have had a tapeworm and still been satisfied. The blue cheese was a great compliment to the frizzled onions and the bun was awesome... not too much, not too little. The shoestring fries were oily and delicious and thank god they came with ketchup or I would have been very afraid to ask. The burger was probably one of my favorites, but Father's office in Santa Monica was maybe a little better. For New York, this is one of my top choices. Def come here for a drink but try and sneak a burger in if you can manage the wait and you wallet can manage the bill.

6 out of 10 ninja stars

314 W 11th St # 1
New York, NY 10014
(212) 620-0393
www.thespottedpig.com

Food Quest Update: Hot Sauce

So I am still looking for a fish taco under 10 dollars, and the perfect burger. But so far I have narrowed down the hot sauce best to these few brands. Hot sauce has always been important at making bad food good and good food better. A good hot sauce will spice up a bland dish but wont set your face on fire and numb your taste buds so that the bottle of tequila your drinking doesn't make you puke so you can get really drunk and maybe get lucky. But back to hot sauce. So these three are my far-out favorites and should definitely be tried. Honorable mentions go to Tapatio and Cholula
but neither hold a flame to these amazing torch holders of hot saucy-ness. From the far east and probably invented by Thai stick fighters who would put it on their hands along with glue and broken glass (we all saw that movie) is the amazing raging hen; Sriracha sauce. It is both hot and flavorful. can be used on any dish from burgers to spaghetti. It works on Mexican food as well as on Chinese. The next sauce was probably invented in a laboratory and boasts some serious chipotle power.
Tabasco brand chipotle hot sauce is one of the most flavorful and yet still pretty hot sauces around. Its like crack, I constantly re-apply to my favorite dishes but it really only complements Mexican food well. The final sauce is a bit elusive. I can only get it from my St. Johns connection in the caribbean. Its super hot and super delicious. All natural and probably going to burn a whole in your stomach good. Both the yellow and red are good and the bottle is decorated with a sombrero for your pet mouse. Its called Caribbee and its hard to find goodness in every bottle.

Far cry from a nightmare. (Amalia NYC)

There are some restaurants that try too hard to be different and good and then there are those that succeed in being a unique stand out dining experience. Amalia is just that. The details here were crazy cool. My table was on the elevated second level which overlooks the lower dining area, and I felt like a king and I could do anything to my lower caste like pee on them and laugh. But, alas, I was just sitting on the upper room and my crown was non existent. The ceiling had french masterworks backlit on it and there was no wall without some kind of very cool and interesting pattern or whatever to look at. The server was really good, he made excellent recommendations and he had plenty of time to take excellent care of my table. I was destined to get some from my hot date for sure. The food was so good but the appetizers were a bit small. I wish there had been a little more going on. I mean two buttery delicious scallops with black truffle and risotto was just enough to make me want to choke the busboy for another. The lamb meatballs were really good, and when they arrived and the guy put them down and called them "lamb balls" I laughed as I delighted in their deliciousness. My main course was the dry aged steak which was... amazing. I was brought to food nirvana on this one. I mean, I spent a lot of time in Argentina and this steak could have surpassed all of those combined. I think there must be an Argentinian cheerleader crying in a corner of a windowless room while chained to a broken toilet somewhere because of my last comment but I just cannot tell a lie. I finished with the white chocolate mousse with coconut ice cream. It was really good. I also had a signature gin drink called the demeter which was also excellent. I really enjoyed this place.

9 out of 10 ninja stars

204 W 55th St
New York, NY 10019
(212) 245-1234
www.amalia-nyc.com

Become a human flamethrower. (Tamarind NYC)

I must have passed this restaurant 100 times on my way to work before finally breaking down and checking it out for myself. I must say I was pleasantly surprised. This is the first Indian restaurant I've been to that isn't over decorated with christmas lights or weird Indian relics. It was really simple and tasteful. The menu was gorgeous as well. I mean they had everything and anything I loved in Indian food. This is of course, the kind of food that will turn you into a human flame thrower the next day and probably make it impossible to be 'regular' for a week, but it was worth it. And to report so far, two days later i'm ok. The Indian food standard dish for comparison is as always chicken tikka and this place nailed it! The saag panir was good, and there were a few more dishes I dont know how to pronounce let alone spell that I highly recommend. So just order everything on the menu and hope you got some of the same things I did. I highly recommend this place. Oh and my date payed this time so I am not really sure how expensive it is. So when you go have your date pay and you wont be surprised.

8 out of 10 ninja stars

41 E 22nd St
New York, NY 10010
(212) 674-7400
www.tamarinde22.com

Street Food for Rich People. (Oyamel DC)

Expensive Mexican 'street food'?  I know I was skeptical but meeee GUSTA!  Creative, hip and delicious—but bring mucho dinero, this place can get pricey.   The menu is packed with many different Mexican 'street food' specialties that are served in small plates.  I've been to Mexico many a times, and trust me 'street food' is not something you normally would want to try--but somehow Oyamel makes eating tacos seem rico suave.  Our server recommended we each order 3-4 plates—and she was right because the plates were pretty small in portion.  Delicious stand outs include: "Ceviche de Salmon con maracuya y epazote" for ceviche lovers, "Camarones al epazote" which are spicy grilled shrimp, and if you love scallops be sure to try the "Cayo de hacha con salsa de pepitas de calabaza" which were grilled scallops seasoned with pumpkin seeds.  If you love guacamole, Oyamel's "Guacamole al tomatillo con queso fresco" is an interesting diversion from what you would normally find as it contains goat cheese—but it's still oddly delicious.  Mexican tacos in hand-made corn tortillas are also items that should not be passed up, especially the wild mushroom "Tacos de hongos" and for chipotle lovers the "Tinga poblana."  Margaritas were delicious and creative with a "salt air," a foam of salt that floated on top of the drink instead of salt around the rim, but at $10 for a small lowball glass, be prepared to take out a small loan to get muy borracha.  

8 out of 10 ninja stars

401 7^th St NW

Washington, DC 20004

http://www.oyamel.com/